The Marriage Health Assessment
Reflect on the strengths and challenges in your marriage with a structured Marriage Health Assessment designed to help couples understand key areas of their relationship.
The Marriage Health Assessment is a structured set of reflection questions covering the areas that most often shape how a marriage feels day to day. It is designed to help couples put language to what is working and what quietly needs attention.
What is a marriage health assessment?
A marriage health assessment is a structured way of reflecting on your relationship rather than relying on how things happen to feel on a given day. Instead of one broad question — are we happy? — you answer a series of specific statements about communication, connection, conflict, trust, intimacy and shared direction.
Structure matters because marriages rarely struggle everywhere at once. A couple can be deeply committed and still find that one area, such as how they handle disagreement, is carrying more strain than they realised. Answering area by area makes those differences visible.
What areas of a marriage can it help you reflect on?
The assessment groups its questions into the themes that counsellors most often see couples raise.
Communication and being understood
How openly you speak, how well you listen, and whether difficult subjects can be raised without the conversation shutting down.
Emotional connection and intimacy
Whether you still feel close, valued and known by each other, and how comfortably affection and intimacy are expressed.
Conflict and repair
What happens during disagreements, how quickly you recover afterwards, and whether the same argument keeps returning.
Trust, commitment and shared direction
Confidence in each other, alignment on money, family and future plans, and how work and other demands affect your time together.
Who is this assessment for?
It is for married couples who want a clear picture of where their marriage stands today. That includes couples who feel broadly content and want to protect what they have, as well as couples who sense that something has drifted but cannot name it.
You can complete it on your own or separately as a couple. Many people find that comparing two sets of results opens a more honest conversation than either would have started unprompted.
What can you learn from your results?
You receive an overall score, a breakdown by category, and a detailed report you can download and keep. The value is not the number itself but the pattern it reveals: which areas are strong, which are mixed, and which deserve a conversation soon.
Read the report together if you can. Rather than debating whether a score is fair, use it as a starting point — pick the one area with the lowest score and talk about what would make it better by a single point.
Why it can help to address relationship issues early
Most marriages do not break down over a single event. They drift, slowly, through small unaddressed frustrations that turn into assumptions, and assumptions that turn into distance. By the time a couple describes a problem as serious, the pattern behind it has often been running for years.
Reflecting early is far easier than repairing late. Naming a difficulty while both of you still feel warm towards each other means you are solving a problem rather than negotiating out of resentment.
Does this replace marriage counselling?
No. This is a reflection tool, not a diagnosis and not therapy. It cannot see your history, your context or the things you have not been able to say to each other yet.
If your results raise something painful, if the same issue keeps returning, or if either of you feels unsafe, speaking with a professional counsellor is the appropriate next step. The assessment is a useful thing to bring with you to that conversation.
Frequently asked questions
How long does the Marriage Health Assessment take?
Most people complete it in five to ten minutes. There is no time limit, and answering honestly matters more than answering quickly.
What areas does the assessment explore?
It covers emotional connection, communication, conflict and repair, trust, intimacy, shared vision for the future, and the balance between work and married life.
Can I complete the assessment on my own?
Yes. Many people complete it individually. Couples can also complete it separately and compare results, which often makes for a more useful conversation.
Are my responses private?
Your responses are confidential and are used to generate your score, your results page and your report. They are not published or shared with anyone else.
Does the assessment replace marriage counselling?
No. It is a structured reflection tool. Where a couple needs professional support, the assessment can help them describe what they want to work on, but it is not a substitute for counselling.
Other resources you may find useful
- Understand your relationship patterns — If the same difficulty keeps returning, look at the patterns underneath it.
- Work through a conflict with the Conflict Navigator — A guided way through the disagreement you keep having.
- Explore conversation questions for couples — Over 250 questions to keep discovering each other.